Now that the RH Bill has been passed in Congress, I can rest assured that access to ‘satisfying’ sex is now an entitlement enshrined in the law. Or can I? Indeed, with the advent of legal access to ‘safe and satisyfying’ sex, a woman can in principle vote with her feet if her man fails in both departments. Or can she? The earlier of course is the easy part. Just get the man to slip on a rubber (now available free to those who cannot afford) and you’re supposedly safe. The latter, however, perhaps may not be that straightforward.
If safe sex is now by law assured by free condoms, what will the state give out for free that will satisfy the law’s “satisfying” stipulation? Free Viagra? That’s assuming of course that a man’s ability to produce a stiff woody alone is enough to qualify the sex he delivers with it as “satisfying”. For that matter, how many girls out there even know enough to tell whether the sex they are already getting is satisfying? Considering that scoring a copy of Satisfying Sex Bible Cosmopolitan will set you back an amount of money that could feed an average Filipino family of five for an entire day, I doubt if the average Filipino woman would be any the wiser. Maybe the government should also give out free copies of Cosmopolitan to poor women.
Indeed, you don’t have to be a poor teenage country lass married to an oversexed tricycle driver to be ignorant of what one is (now by law) entitled to on the banig. I once had a friend back in college to whom it never occured that having sex was supposed to be something that lasted more than two minutes. That there was more to it than that was an orgasmic revelation her second boyfriend was only too happy to facilitate. It’s a happy ending that, unfortunately, does not describe the majority of cases in the Philippines.
Thing is (and I could be mistaken here given my less-than-ideal knowledge about the RH Law), the “safe and satisfying” thingy is one presumably applicable only to married couples. After all, Philippine politicians though they may be hailed today as being the “courageous” enough heroes to dare defy the mighty Catholic Church in signing RH into law are not that ballsy (regardless of how many triathlons certain Senators may run). Sex after all just does not happen before marriage in the Philippines, right? (wink wink) For many a hapless Filipina maiden, the option to test-drive a prospective hubby before tying the knot simply does not exist.
So pity the average God-fearing sex-only-after-I-do Pinay who finds herself trapped in a marriage with the faster-than-a-speeding-bullet Pinoy male. Wham-bang-gone-in-sixty-seconds on the banig is all she gets every night. The RH Law may guarantee her “satisfying” sex, but at the end of the day offers nothing in the way of escape clauses when that part of the contract in a marriage is breached. Divorce in the Philippines, after all, is illegal and its proxy preferred by the swimming pool set, “annulment”, is a perverse philosophical farce far beyond Mrs Superman’s financial means.
So my sympathies to the average Pinay who all but misses out on the golden nuggets of 21st Century wisdom so readily available to many of us in the “gurl-power” articles printed on the pages of Cosmo. I would’ve wanted to congratulate you ladies on your coming a long way, baby the day after the dawn of “reproductive health” in the Philippines. Sadly, despite “satisfying sex” being successfully legislated in the Philippines, it does not look like there will be much coming going on for Pinays on banigs all over the archipelago tonight.
[NB: A banig is a bed woven out of Philippine hemp that is used in traditional Filipino households.]
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