If my religion teacher had behaved like Freddie Aguilar

What are we to make of Pinoy music legend Freddie Aguilar’s dating a 16-year-old girl? Not surprisingly, most netizens reacted with an Ewwww. At 16 the girl is 44 years younger than Mang Freddie. What might it be like for a girl of 16 to be dating a 60-year-old man?

I’m sure a lot of Yemeni women will have something to share around that sort of thing. But this is the Philippines where there is an abundance of young men. After all, by my rough reckoning, as much as 20 percent of Filipina young women could be beyond the reach of the average Pinoy male — with many of them toiling away as domestics and factory workers abroad or dead-set on bagging a pensyonado foreigner from the First World. This means there are many Filipino men who are looking.

freddie_aguilarThen again, who are we to judge Mang Freddie? By all accounts, he does not seem to be someone who’s got something to hide. He dates her publicly (they were first spotted together attending the 5th Star Awards for Music at Solaire Resort & Casino), admits to being in love with her, and announced to the public that he plans to marry her. A lot of women twice this girl’s age cannot even claim to have had a partner who would gush about them with the same gusto!

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Age after all is just a number. There are 16 year olds who can hold a permanent job and some have even raised great kids after having had them at that age. And then there are some 30-year-olds I know who just can’t put their lives in order. On Facebook, I see a lot of middle-aged women dressing like 20-something pretty young things. We celebrate that kind of thing and regard the number that supposedly defines how they ought to dress and behave as a quaint irrelevance. But then in the case of Freddie’s current squeeze, that number suddenly becomes the single point of contention around which us spectators design our savagely judgmental tweets.

To be fair it’s all probably easy for me to say. If I had a 16-year-old daughter, I wouldn’t want her to be dating a 60-year-old guy with long black hair. For that matter, I wouldn’t want her dating a 17-year-old with long black hair either! I’d feel like telling that hypothetical 60-year-old suitor, “Don’t you think you ought to leave someone who still has a life ahead of her alone?”

Indeed, we appreciate the power men with mature and worldly minds have over girls who are smitten by them. When I was 17, I had this humungous crush on my young religion teacher. Perhaps because he was a religion teacher, a lot of students pereceived him to be the sort of person who they could be safely comfy with. It was not uncommon to see him surrounded by a handful of students each competing with the other for a chance to put in some small talk. It’s not that they all had the hots for him. He just came across as a very approachable go-to person. I only now, in my riper years, worked out what might have been the source of his harmless magnetism. Religion is a pretty relevant topic in the mind of a student in a Catholic all-girls’ school. And to have a tall, lanky, cute young man presumably knowledgeable on that topic on campus available to discuss the matter was simply too good to be true.

More important is the difference between a mid-twenties guy who’s had several girlfriends (if I recall right he had two in high school, one in college, and the fourth one he was with at the time he was our teacher) and the average pimply 17- to 19-year-old guys that came to our soirees and parties at the time. 25-year-olds exuded coolness without even trying. Most 17-year-old guys, in contrast, failed even if they tried hard.

In short, guys like my religion teacher, already had many of us at “hello”. Thing is, “hello” is all my religion teacher ever said (figuratively, ok?) to us even if some of us wished he would say or do more than that. Did my religion teacher know how much power he had over the minds and wills of his teenage female students? Most likely. He’d have probably worked it out — maybe even considered using some of it on some of us. But he didn’t. And that is why my admiration and respect for him grew and matured.

Personally I look back and wonder if I would have behaved myself if he had shown the least bit more “curiousity” about me than he had exhibited during a couple of the one-on-one consultations I had with him in his office. But that’s just me looking back wistfully at could-have-beens in my youth with my 30-something mind. In truth, a 16-year-old would not have that same twinkle in her eye about such “possibilities” that I now presently use to color my memories of my religion teacher.

And that is the only thing about Mang Freddie that I wonder about. Did he have to act on something just because it felt “so right”? But then, who are we to judge.

39 Replies to “If my religion teacher had behaved like Freddie Aguilar”

  1. The guy is a pedophile so why is he not in jail? Read part of the law about being in the company of children.
    The act when a person who, no relative of child, is found alone with the said child inside the
    room or cubicle of a house, an inn hotel, motel, pension house, apartelle or other similar
    establishments, vessel, vehicle or any other hidden or secluded area under circumstances which
    would lead a reasonable person to believe that the child is about to be exploited in prostitution,
    and other sexual abuse.

    The above act renumbers the relevant code to Title Eight Chapter Three
    Article 266-A. “Rape, When And How Committed. — Rape is committed –

    1) By a man who shall have carnal knowledge of a woman under any of the following cricumstances:
    a) Through force, threat, or intimidation;
    b) When the offended party is deprived [of] reason or otherwise unconscious;
    c) By means of fraudulent machination or grave abuse of authority; and
    d) When the offended party is under twelve (12) years of age or is demented, even though none of the circumstances mentioned above be present.

    2) By any person who, under any of the circumstances mentioned its [sic] paragraph 1 hereof, shall commit an act of sexual assault by inserting his penis into another person’s mouth or anal orifice, or any instrument or object, into the genital or anal orifice of another person.”
    This includes having sex with a person under the age of 18.

    If this was a foreigner he would already be in jail for the next 40 years for this offense.

    1. Like most Filipino laws; this one appears to be selectively enforced. Even a cursory look at the nation’s birth records will reveal several thousand women under the age of 18 give birth every year. Why are the men who impregnated them not prosecuted. If the girl or her family does not care; why should we? Would this be news if he was not a celebrity?

      1. It would be news if he was a foreigner because national outrage would fill the media and the guy would be in prison.

        1. You cannot have a law that only applies to one person or one group of persons (i.e.: foreigners.) That violates the “equal protection” clause of the Constitution. If you remember, that clause was invoked by Corona and used to defang an early corruption probe against GMA. Poorly written laws that cannot be enforced are worse than no law at all because they undermine respect for all laws.

        2. Regardless of how the law is written it is selectively enforced. Take note that when a hooker bar in Angeles is raided the only people prosecuted are foreigners. This is in a place where the foreigner cannot own more than 40% of the business, so where are the Pinoy owners when time for arrests come down?

  2. Freddie Aguilar is an Artist. Being one he must have that passion and relentless pursuit of that orgasmic nirvana be it with music or with new, young and exciting ones of the oppossite sex. I guess he still have enough of those juices in his tank to fire that piston underneath the hood.

    1. Being an artist does not mean that he is not a pedophile criminal when he sleeps with a child of 16. Like I have said before, if he was a foreigner he would be in prion, not just the gossip columns.

        1. The crime is presumed to have happened if he was in a room alone with her. That is the law here in The Philippines.

        2. “Oh noes as 60-year old songwriter announcing his romantic relationship with a 16-year old minor, pedo pedo pedo pedopedopedoagefoconsentpedopedoburnhimatastakepedopedopedo”

          So, where are the the news of them “moral guardians of our wonderful society” filing formal raps against the man?

  3. @Jerry Lynch

    I don’t know. I don’t see any part in the Article 266-A that could be used again Freddir Aguilar. Unless the girl admits they did have sex. And that is even arguable in a court of law.

    In in your definition of rape, all person in a random house can be persecuted for rape from any person younger than 18 years old. As long as they’re not related.

    1. Actually a man CAN be prosecuted for rape in this country if he is alone in a house with an unrelated child. What I posted was actually a paste from Philippine law and not something I just made up.

      The link I am now posting is some kind of blog for gays I believe, but the relevant laws are posted.

  4. I live in New Zealand where we have same sex marriages are now legal. My fiancée is 25 years old and I am 57…Does this make me a paedophile. It is social perceptions measured with person and social opinion’s why gay and lesbians have been murdered and ridiculed. In the case of a 16 year old in a relationship with a 60 year old, there is nothing wrong unless it is illegal. Is their relationship illegal, is Freddie breaking the law, the sexual consent between male and female they must be over the age of 16 in New Zealand. If you put human existence on a scale 1 to 100, humans are only in the crawling stage, that’s why in this case of Freddie Aguliar, people are discriminating against him

    1. The age of consent is 18 in The Philippines, except when both parties are younger. and he can even be prosecuted for being ALONE with her. In your case both of you are of the age of consent so you are not a pedophile. Pedophilia is having sex with under aged people (children).

  5. well kahit ano pa pong sabihin mo ay may nilabag pong batas iyong mga adults na nakikipagrelasyon sa isang menor de edad at ito po ay seduction of minor and child abuse law.

  6. I would let them be, but there’s the case of the Family Code saying only those age 18 and above can marry. Freddie’s media announcement was too early. They could’ve waited till the girl was 18. Legal issues abound.

  7. Freddie aguilar may want to feel young – but a 60 year old feeling a 16 year old is perverted.
    At least she has a younger sister for when freddie hits 70.
    he clearly likes them young!
    The philippines ‘jimmy savile’

  8. I disagree with Kate where she says that “age is just a number”. Age – normally and usually – says a lot more than just being a number. Moreover in the case of an “dirty old man” of 60 with a young child of 16.

    Unless of course, Kate thinks that every 16 year old has the same (emotional, cognitive) “bagage” as an 30, 40, 50, 60 year old.

    In most western societies the 60 year old will be called a sick pervert. And the 16 year old (or 25, 35 year old) will be called – something like a – golddigger.

    How in this god’s green earth can they grow old TOGETHER? The 60 year old will die in 10 years time from now, leaving the other party with 2, 3 kids and being 26. Ah well, she can still find another partner and still have 2, 3 more kids with him. Totalling the number of kids to 5 or 6. And who is complaining about the overpopulated Philippines? Probably nobody.

    Rape in my country is any sexual intercourse without consent.
    Pedophilia is when one mature person (18+) has sex with a minor (below 18).

    1. I for one, have been complaining about the overpopulation for the 11 years I have lived here. Even though I was born and raised a Catholic I have been against their birth control stance ever since I was old enough to think for myself.

  9. Catholic bishop said in response to aquilar issue – “age doesn’t matter”
    For bishops/priests we all know that age does matter to them – they must be under 14.
    no wonder rape,insest, trafficking so prevalent in tge philippines.
    no moral compass

  10. Anyone who judges Freddie Aguillar is just a self-righteous dooshbag. if the young-lady is involved with the old-fart willingly, and is not being forced to do anything against her will….leave them alone.

    the standard I set for myself is that if I look ridiculous walking ANYWHERE with the lady I am with, then I do not belong in the relationship. Another one is that if the Lady I am pursuing is younger than my own daughter…I can not be involved.

    BUT BUT BUT, if the young lady is after Freddie’s money, and he is going to cough some of it up….good for the both of them! I see nothing wrong with prostitution in any form as it provides people with what they want. the old guy gets a young hottie and the young hottie gets grandpa’s cash…a win-win situation.

    For all the JUDGES out there, YOU have no right to throw stones!

  11. ask the average 70 year old Man :”Yo Grandpa, truthfully, would you like to get one more shot at a 19 year old hottie?”. the answer is always , “You bet your life I would.”.
    A lot of people love to call other people ‘perverts’, ‘sicko’s’ and all sorts of nasty names. I have always suspected that those people just want to feel good about themselves as they are usually the miserable sort, dis-satisfied with their lot in life and jealous of what others have.
    The Philippines criminal justice system has better things to do than bothering Freddie Aguillar for being with a slightly under-age girl. if he were in France it would be ‘Legal’ and no issue at all.

      1. @ JL, Thanks for the enlightening words Jerry…NOT!
        My comment? it was simply a way to highlight the fact that the Philippine justice system should have much bigger fish to fry, OMG! as well as pointing out the fact the Freddie Aguillar and his GF are actually in love. so it is not even a case of outright rape. I could never do as he is doing but I wont condemn the Man for it.

        1. You probably need to learn your own laws. The guy can be prosecuted for rape simply because she is under aged. However, the police might invest a bit of time in arresting the convicted murderer Ruben Ecleo Jr. who is “hiding” in his house in San Jose, Dinagat.

      2. statutory rape laws do not escape me.
        the parents would have to file a complaint, in most countries. BUT IF IF IF he transported the girl over state lines, say, in the USA? the authorities could get involved without a parental complaint.
        IDK what the law states about THAT in the Failippines and I do not care. When I am in the country I will not be alone in any room with anyone under the age of 25 as it is not going to be this Kano that finds out how draconian the laws of the country are. in the states smoking weed is now legal in a few places BUT I would never even think about sparkin a fat one up in that idiotic country.
        the Failippines has fast become a place for a lot of people to avoid, for a lot of different reasons. just ask anyone from Hong Kong what country is last on their ‘places to go’ list.

  12. Browsing through the article in Wikipedia on Age of Consent, particularly on the History section, the age of consent before was set around 12-13 years old, that is, at start of puberty. Eventally at 19th Century, the age limit was raised as to protect the child from sexual exploitation.

    In my opinion, the core of the issue is if the young lady is mature, that is, if she’s mentally fit and emotionally prepared to get into romantic, sexual relationship. The hardest part is to determine accurately if she’s mature enough. Hence, I think the age of consent can be seen as a safe rule of thumb, albeit flawed and inaccuate, to determine if one is mature to engage in sexual relationship.

  13. Unless the girl and her parents actually sue Freddy I highly doubt the authorities would bother. Perhaps, they are indeed truly in love with each other. As for the family, I’m with the impression that they benefit financially from the relationship.

    1. The law says he is a pedophile and should be prosecuted for being with an under age girl. The law does NOT provide a “we are in love” defense/exception nor does it allow a “parental permission/acceptance” exception.

  14. I find myself in between Kate and Jerry Lynch. Indeed, if the guy was a white foreigner the NBI would have him slapped in cuffs in no time, he would be paraded in front of the newsmedia and some presidential tsak force would make a statement that the girl was now ‘saved’ and under the protection of child welfare.
    Wether in this case applying the law is the best thing is another issue, but the law is there to protect those people of whom we -as a society- think that they are not capable of taking their own informed decisions.
    So… eventhough the girl syas to be in love, that is not really relevant as the law says she is not mature enough to decide abt that.
    That Freddy is in love also makes no difference as he as an adult ‘is supposed to know better’ and it s exactly types as Freddy that the law is made to protect these girls from.

    Wether 16 or 18 for that matter is the right age of consent, indeed is up for discussion. there are countries in which 13 is the age of consent and there are even western countries like iceland and scandinavia where it is 15 and I think portugal also allows 13. Are we to call everybody having sex with a 14 year old, within the law, a pedophile???
    If so… there are countries with an age of consent of 21…. then havve those countries the right to call everyone in the phils having sex with an 18 -20 year old a pedophile?

    What does bother me though is indeed the bias in which this is handled. I mentioned the foreigner already, but why would this be OK because it is done under muslim rites. Wrong is wrong, why is it suddenly not wrong if it is done by muslims

    That might be all true, but it is n

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